Saying Sorry Is the Narcissist’s Best Way to Trap You

These three specific traps are what give Apologetic Narcissists, continued free reign, in your life.

Dr. Ava Pommerenk
6 min readJul 10, 2020

Many of us who have a record of being partnered with Narcissists, understand there are several ways Narcissists do their damage in relationships.

I want to focus here on the act of apologizing.

There are those in the Narcissist camp who will rarely if ever apologize. Then, there are those who will say sorry.

I call the ones who apologize, the Apologetic Narcissists. This article will focus on them.

The Apologetic Narcissist

The Apologetic Narcissist may apologize sometimes, moderately, or a lot! Yet, this apology ends up meaning next to nothing, because even if their behavior does initially change, they eventually revert back to their same harmful ways. They may be on their best behavior for a period of time, but eventually they “slip” back in to doing the same abusive, selfish, deceitful, arrogant, dismissive, manipulative, exploitative stuff, once again. Then when you get enraged and upset, and are unwilling to stand for it any longer, they know they can…



Dr. Ava Pommerenk

Coach. Psychologist. Writing about new perspectives, love, relationships, Narcissism, healing, transformation, & culture.